Showing posts with label Hope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hope. Show all posts

Sunday, February 20, 2011

"The Wind Beneath My Wings"

Believe it or not, once upon a time, I was a cumbersome, confused, and timid parent. I knew something just wasn't right, but I still walked out of that doctor’s office time and again that first year feeling some sick sense of relief that since he told me my little girl was still in the normal range then it must be true. Well, just how did I get from there to here?


My first “teammate” in this journey was my grandmother. It was shot day for Jadyne. In fact, if my stress-strained memory serves me right, I believe Jadyne was about six months old. My grandmother came to the doctor’s office to see her great-grandbabies. Both my cousin and I saw the same pediatrician, and that day we had simultaneous appointments. My grandmother didn’t have that grimace face out of pity for Jadyne’s tears, though. There were no tears. No, her grimace was a look of shock and wonder. This was no “tough kid” as our pediatrician had been claiming. “Jackie, that’s not normal for a baby not to cry getting shots. Something’s wrong with her!” my grandmother exclaimed. Still I had no clue, not even a guess at that time, what was the cause, but at least now, I wasn't the only one seeing a problem. Thank you, Gram.


A few months later, after switching pediatricians, and after formal audiology and pathology would confirm there was some problem definitely present, we started Early Intervention. These therapists were amazing! They didn’t just do their jobs, they loved their jobs. They were underpaid; their cars were beat to hell and back from all the travel; they were overqualified; and they were miracles for Jadyne. Jadyne was 14 months old by the time they were brought in, and for 12 of those 14 months, I had been chirping (ever so quietly) that something just wasn’t right. After just the initial visit, the early intervention staff gave me a new phrase—Defensive Sensory Integration Disorder. It didn’t count as a “real” diagnosis because it didn’t come from an “expert” with fancy letters like PhD or MD after his name, but to me it was golden, to me it was a tangible opponent. I was no longer fighting a ghost. In the future months and years, the early intervention staff would lean heavily on the consideration of autism. In fact, although they were denied over and over by the doctors any diagnosis whatsoever for Jadyne, the early intervention staff began treating her for autism anyway. The early intervention staff introduced us to the Wilbarger Treatment and helped us implement it. Jadyne emerged. They also helped me to deal with the new offensive sensory behaviors, to recognize that Jadyne’s “behaviors” were really just reactions to her stimuli in this world. There is a small window of opportunity that we have to reach these kids. Thank you, Valerie, Amy, and Julie.


Unfortunately Early Intervention was only available from birth to three in my area. I was able to attain an Autism Spectrum Disorder diagnosis of PDD-NOS when Jadyne was four years old. Within six months, that diagnosis would change to autism. My next hero in this story is a particular school. My company had me stationed in southern Ohio. The Early Learning Center in South Point, OH was, and is to this day, the best traditional education system I have ever encountered. They didn’t delay the process by requesting all their own evaluations. They simply accepted the myriad of evaluations Jadyne already had. She was in school within a couple days after calling them. They didn’t fight about a bus. No, riding a full size bus and providing her an aide were a given. The teachers were phenomenal. You could just tell how much they loved these kids. The school had a "blue room" with sensory and physical therapy equipment. Children weren’t scolded or punished when they were acting out; they were taken to the sensory room to relax and calm down. Jadyne even had a friend there. If one single school could produce even half the rapport and results of the staff of this school, Jadyne would probably still be in a traditional school setting. ELC let me know that traditional schools can provide an extraordinary educational experience for children with autism. Thank you.


Somewhere in this time, I joined a budding organization through Myspace called Banish Autism Discrimination (B.A.D. Moms). I loved the feisty, tenacious mindset of the founder, Kimmie. She was sick and tired of the discrimination her son faced in even the most innocent of public places, like a movie theater. She had enough, and she was speaking out, and others were listening. The organization flourished. The stories poured in of similar discrimination stories. B.A.D. moms began to join together with a newfound herd power. Letters and calls would flood an offender’s place of business. No matter how big that organization got, Kimmie always took the time to respond to personal messages. I probably owe her a mansion in the amount of time she put into guiding me towards answers for Jadyne during those early years. I try to "pay it forward" now through things like this blog. She is simply brilliant. Through her, I learned to stand and fight. B.A.D. Moms gave me the ability and know-how to research answers until I found them. They groomed me into the advocate I am today. Thank you, B.A.D. Moms.


It took a tremendous amount of support from family, organizations, and professionals to get us through. That need is never satisfied. I still maintain my involvement in support organizations and my hunt for new information and products. If that was how I got here, let’s look at where I am now, and what keeps me from falling flat on my face today.


Parents with multiple children and busy schedules can find the task of going to a support group daunting. It’s not that we don’t realize the power in numbers of people experiencing our same life. It’s just that it’s so tough to coordinate the ability to go to a traditional support setting. The World Autism Community does a stunning job of resolving that issue for parents. I consider it kind of the “Facebook” for the Autism Community. After you register (100% free site), you are given the ability to join various forum groups on specific topics like “Therapies”, “Multimedia”, and “You Gotta Laugh”, just to name a few. Parents from all over offer advice on any topic you throw at them. If you’re affected by Autism Spectrum Disorders and you’re feeling overwhelmed and alone, please know you are not alone and come join us on The World Autism Community. Even if you feel like you got it all together, still join us. You could make the difference in someone’s life today.


For years, I’ve dreaded trying to find HONEST information on autism. As a parent on the front lines, it’s imperative I receive accurate intelligence, but when the big dollar pharmaceutical companies and organizations like the American Academy of Pediatrics get involved, the mainstreamed news circuit can be flooded with a “cereal box” tone.


Silly news show, “Trix are for kids!”


When the news story of Wakefield’s research broke, I was irate. Suddenly, people were talking about autism, finally. However, no one was talking about the successful 1322 hidden cases in the US Vaccine Court where the courts ruled vaccines had caused brain damage, including autism. Let's pause for a second. Say that number aloud. One THOUSAND three hundred twenty-two cases PROVEN, not in some backwoods no-name town court, but the UNITED STATES court that vaccines (which particular one and what particular element is still up for debate) have caused brain damage, including autism. No one was talking about the book “Don’t Drink Your Milk!” written by the Director of the Department of Pediatrics at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and Physician-in-Chief of the Johns Hopkins Children's Center. No one was talking about the way these kids fall through every crack—insurance that doesn’t pay, doctors that don’t listen, medicine that doesn’t exist, schools that can’t produce, and on and on. No, instead a deluge of attacks on cautious vaccinators flooded the national news and social media sites. No one was talking......except a few, a few organizations like Generation Rescue, Age of Autism, and 14 Studies pressed forward in a crusade for truth.




I still check the national news and “majority” viewpoints. I do it to stay balanced. However, when I want to hear the real truth, I go to Age of Autism. It’s a no–frills, no “trix”, and reliable resource for families affected by this disorder. They’re not afraid to ruffle some feathers. That’s what journalism was supposed to be about, the truth. When did it become about giving the public what they want to hear? Aren’t there soap operas still on television for the fantasy-minded individuals? Thank you, Age of Autism, for meticulously addressing and correcting the “cereal box” media. We need more like you!


To my family, my friends, to Early Intervention Specialists, to B.A.D. Moms, to the Early Learning Center, to The World Autism Community, and to Age of Autism..


THANK YOU!!!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Team Jadyne Video

Please repost for us. Thank you!



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GREAT GREAT GREAT Awareness PSA Videoby National Autism Association
...and THIS is why we walk!!!
Please share this!


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Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Join Team Jadyne

It's that time of year again. How exciting!

Please register to Join Our Team!

12th Annual Pittsburgh
Walk Now for Autism Speaks

Saturday June 4, 2011




The Walk Now for Autism Speaks event isn't just about the donations. It's a whole lot of fun, too! The first time I saw just HOW many people attend this event, I was in complete awe. It's a family-friendly event, too. The pre-walk event has booths set up with free food, activities, games, and a variety of vendors. They even have a kids tent area. (One year we didn't even make it 1/4 mile of the 5k walk. Jadyne just could not handle the crowds. The kids tent was PERFECT for her with sensory activities and quiet play.)

What if I can't walk 5k?
That's right, technically it's a 5k walk, but it's ok if you can't make the trek. There's other ways to help our team fight autism!

  • Just showing up to support the team is a huge help!
  • Attend our meet and greet with none other than the guest of honor herself, Miss Jadyne. It's a sensory friendly finger painting event. (Please wear old clothes.) We make signs and banners and even team t-shirts.
  • Ask your local businesses to let Team Jadyne have a donation jar near their register. We'll supply the flyers and materials!
  • Post our link http://tinyurl.com/teamjadyne to your personal webpage, blog, social site, or twitter.
  • Talk with your family, friends, and co-workers about us.
  • There is no such thing as a donation too small. Please donate if you can, but donations are NOT required. Every little bit will help add up to our team goal of $1,000. Visit our site to donate online or to print a donation form for mail-in donations.
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“Your child has autism.”

These four simple words define the facts. They are useful in explaining the past but they do not predict the future. They do not convey the devastating toll that autism has had on our family nor limit our determination to overcome this disorder. They are words that a new family will hear every 15 minutes.

By participating in this event, our hope is that we will soon hear “Your child no longer has autism.”

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Together we can do this!

Email Us at teamjadyne@gmail.com

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Sunday, February 13, 2011

Are You a "Curebie"? I Am!

Yesterday, I bought a book called All I Can Handle by Kim Stagliano. I have felt first hand, the deep levels of frustration, as in my post "What Do You Parents Do to Prevent Disasters?", as well as the moments you just know you're the most blessed parent on the planet for getting to raise this amazingly tenacious little person, as in my most recent video "I Hear You". I purchased the Nook version of the book based on those facts.

The author has THREE daughters with autism. Part of me was hoping to curb my hedonistic self-pity sessions on future disaster days (because oh they WILL come!) by recalling the old theory, "It could always be worse." I mean if she can do it with three daughters. I sure can with one, right?

The other reason that led me to purchase it was the references to the author's humor. Laughter is what keeps me from cracking under all the pressure. Sometimes, when all hell breaks loose, and I walk into my kitchen at 3am to find my supposed-to-be-sleeping child covered head to toe in permanent marker and cereal scattered across my table with peanut butter caked in her hair, in moments like those, without laughter in my heart, I'd probably have died from a coronary disease by 26 years old.

The book has lived up to the reviews! It's laugh-out-loud hilarious and refreshingly honest. Thus far, my favorite statement came from pages 27-28. I'll include the quote below, personalizing it, I encourage all of you to as well. If you're a D-mom (mom of a diabetic child), personalize it to the disease you take head on for your child. Switch the name out to be your child. Educators and therapists can do this exercise, as well. Switch out "parent" for your occupation. Think of one special kiddo that's really touched your heart, and put in their name. I say we start a "Curebie Nation." Ask yourself, "Am I Curebie?" I know I sure am!!!
I'm a "curebie". That's an autism parent who believes that, in our lifetime, we will be able to bring these kids to a point where they blend in with their peers and can live full, independent lives--through a combination of medical treatment, therapy, schooling, and a rosary that stretches from Connecticut to California. Call it recovery. Call it cure. Call it remission. Call it pasta e fagioli. I don't give a crap what it's called. I'm not going to argue semantics. I just want (((Jadyne))) to be able to live a garden-variety, normal life without needing an adult to keep her safe....I want a cure for her, damn right. What kind of parent would I be if I didn't? I'm just willing to admit it in public. If people think that means I don't love my (((daughter))) the way (((she))) is, screw them. There. Honest enough?1
I read my fair share of written material. I go to school full time. I read for knowledge, and I read for pleasure. I've read countless books on Autism Spectrum Disorder, parenting, relationships, and on and on. This book is by far one of the most well-written and most captivating ones I've purchased in a long time. Five stars and a must read!

Don't be shy to post your "curebie" comments, too!

1 Reference:

Stagliano, Kim, and Jenny McCarthy (Foreword). All I can handle-- I'm no Mother Teresa: a life raising three daughters with autism. New York: Skyhorse Pub., 2010. Digital e-book.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Will Jadyne Ever Live a Normal Life?

I'm asked this question often. People ask detailed questions, too.

  • "Will she ever drive a car?"
  • "Will she ever go to college?"
  • "Will she ever get married? Have a family?"
The list of these futuristic questions is endless. Truthfully, I just don't know. Only Jadyne will be able to show us her full potential. My job as her parent is not trying to predict her potential but to ensure no other forces limit her potential, such as under-concerned doctors, ineffective educational systems, and even the uneducated general public to whom she is exposed at Wal-Mart, the grocery store, the park, and anywhere outside our home.

What I can say for certain is that having autism is not a death sentence for a "normal" life. I have even received the very insensitive question, "What is she really good at? You know, like Rainman. Autistic people are idiot savants, right?" If you use this term, I beg you please eliminate it from your vocabulary. If Rainman is all that comes to mind when you hear autism, then I beg you to subscribe to my blog to find the truth behind autism.

All of this comes about after a recent IEP review, progress report, and meeting. Jadyne's goals were always set low. During the initial IEP meetings years ago, I stated I felt her goals were too low, but I was told not to fuss, that it's best to set her goals low so that she can exceed them. I found this acceptable, and we moved on. However, Jadyne's IEP review states, "Jadyne is cooperative and pleasant and eager to learn." It further states, "Jadyne has minimally met her goals." I think this needs re-worded to be "The staff and curriculum presented have failed to meet Jadyne's low-balled goals due to an inability or unwillingness to learn the language of a cooperative and pleasant child who has shown great interest in learning our non-autistic ways." No, instead we blame the "cooperative, pleasant, and eager to learn" child implying she has failed.

My darling Jadyne, I hear you, even in the absence of your words, and I'm trying to enter your world to help you gain skills that will make this non-autistic world better accept you.......................Love, Mom

In conclusion, to give hope to those who want Jadyne to succeed in life, I'd like to highlight the success of a woman with autism, an autistic savant, Temple Grandin. Temple did attend college, and even earned a graduate education. Her career has included being a professor of animal behavior, designer of animal facilities worldwide, celebrated writer, researcher on autism, and inspirational public speaker. Her first publication in 1986 Emergence: Labled Autistic describes life for an autistic person inside our verbal and emotional world, and her second publication Thinking in Pictures: My Life with Autism, released in 1996, gives us an insider view on the thought processes of someone with autism. Reading her description of how her mind works, I saw many similarities to Jadyne's behaviors.

Finally, I urge you to view this video. It is the courageous attempt of one autistic person to translate their language for us to understand.





http://www.youtube.com/embed/JnylM1hI2jc

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Our Journey with Epilepsy

One of Jadyne's 24hr+ EEGs over the years. She's a trooper.


I know when I first heard the doctors tell me my daughter had epilepsy I thought of a child flailing uncontrollably possibly dying from swallowing her tongue. I'm not quite sure where these myths started, but they simply aren't true.

Jadyne's first seizure was at seven months old. There are many types of seizures, and her first one was an absence seizure. During an absence seizure, the child just stares right through you. They are unresponsive to any stimulation. It is quite scary. I rushed her to the ER, but the ER told me she just had a night terror. A night terror? She's seven months old? What has she possibly experienced in her life so frightening it would even manifest itself as a night terror. From having two other children already, I knew night terrors were more of a toddler stage occurrence. Therefore, I followed-up with her pediatrician. He had performed a neurology residency during his education and knew immediately from the symptoms we described this was indeed an absence seizure. No one in my family had seizures. This frightened me. Shouldn't we do some type of work-up? His answer was that everyone is entitled to one seizure in their lifetime, that it was probably just stimulated by lights or some other type of over-stimulation, and if she had another, then we'd do a work-up. This didn't set right with me, considering she was getting ready for bed when the seizure occurred. The lights were dimmed. The house was quiet. Still I was too new into this lifestyle of a parent of a disabled child to realize I could question and even fight the doctors when needed for her care.

What became the focus soon after as Jadyne turned a year old is that she has missed so many milestones. The formal testing began, and all the tests showed "something" was wrong, but nothing showed exactly what. Therefore, therapy began when she was 14 mos old. Jadyne did all kinds of "quirky" things. She would flap her fingers (later to be discovered to be a stereotypical autistic behavior of atypical handflapping), bang her head, pull hear hair, and more (again all stereotypical autistic behaviors). I had noticed she began to flutter her eyes and bob her head a bit once in awhile, but I just thought this was another "quirk" of hers. Luckily, it was one of her therapists, when she was 2 1/2 that said, "You know, I work with another little boy who has seizures and his seizures look very similar to that eye fluttering she's doing."

Soon after we were at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh; Jadyne was admitted. They kept her for three days and ran every test possible within those three days. The developmental team and neurology team worked together. The conclusion was Jadyne was having so many seizures in a day that it was impossible to count. The possibility lied that her developmental issues were related to the seizures, and the developmental team would continue to rule out possible diagnoses as time went on. The chromosome for autism and epilepsy are closely related, so a single depletion could cause both in theory. As we left, it was confirmed Jadyne had a Generalized Seizure Disorder, also known as Epilepsy. The doctor's put her on Topamax, but she didn't get better, she got worse. For a year the doctor's upped the dosage until finally giving up that this medication, although effective for many and carrying very low side effects, just was not going to be effective for Jadyne.

Currently Jadyne is diagnosed with Generalized Nonconvulsive Epilepsy. We do suspect due to the progression of the manifestation of her seizures and the increase in frequency of her seizures over the years that she will eventually have Generalized Convulsive Epilepsy, as she has already begun to present with some of the criteria for that diagnosis. Fortunately, we were able to find a wonderful pediatric neurologist, Maggi Jaynes, out of WVU Pediatric Neurology. She took Jadyne off the Topamax, knowing immediately that drug would never have proven effective for Jadyne's type of epilepsy and put her on what has proven to be a miracle drug for her, Lamictal. You'll notice if you click that link, the generic form is lamotrogine, which of course, Jadyne was first put on. It worked for about a year. However, she grew a tolerance. The drug must be titrated very slowly due to a very rare side effect. Thus, once the generic form no longer worked, we had to completely retitrate her to the brand necessary form. It takes approximately six months to get to a workable dose. However, Jadyne always showed great results much sooner. She's tolerated the drug very well. Approximately every 6-9 months she'll begin to have seizure breakthroughs, and we'll up the dosage. However, we're still far below the maximum dosage per kilo. I can't say enough about this drug. Thank you, GlaxoSmithKline.

Jadyne still has seizures. She's unaware that she has them. Most are only a few seconds long, just an eye flutter and a head bop. As her tolerance to the medication ensues, she begins to have drop attacks. These have caused injuries to her face and body, and they are what concern us. She will most likely never be seizure free. However, as long as we can keep the seizures to a minimum through miracle medications like Lamictal, she can lead a normal life. Unfortunately not enough of the public is trained in epilepsy that works with children. The term epilepsy is often frightening to many. Jadyne has been needlessly pulled out of class many many times over a few second seizure. There is not a reason a child with epilepsy can't lead a normal life like any other kid.

The term Lennox-Gastaut Syndrome has been thrown around over the years with Jadyne's specialists. However, it can only be diagnosed by a specific spike and wave pattern on an EEG, and it isn't worth taking her off her medication to see if the pattern exists because treatment for that disorder is the same as the treatment regiment she is already using. Regardless of whether she has that disorder or not, her seizures have progressed in manifestation and frequency over the years. This isn't over yet. It isn't unreasonable to believe eventually Jadyne's seizures will manifest into Grand Mal Seizures. In fact there is no difference on an EEG from a Grand Mal Seizure to any other of the Generalized Seizures she has. The only difference is the manifestation in what the body does during the seizure. Our hope is that through the medication and advancement of research and improvement of medications, we can continue to prevent these seizures from occurring for her. So far, we have been very fortunate to find an amazing specialist and a miracle medication, and Jadyne leads a life like any other kid without epilepsy. =)


Saturday, January 8, 2011

MobiGo Breakthrough

For Christmas, I bought JJ a MobiGo and Jadyne an Ereader, both manufactured by Vtech. Just the other day, Jadyne picked up JJ's MobiGo and sat in front of me. Tears streamed down my face as I realized my child without many words indeed was capable of complex thoughts. She manipulated the touch screen boards with ease, correctly solving multi-step processes, and best of all, she taught herself.

For several months preceding this, I was distraught, basing her progress on reports from the school. I worried she was hitting this "plateau" I've heard so much about from all the specialists over the years. What if this was it? What if after all these years, she doesn't get any better than today? Is it time to accept this is her potential?

Such is the life with an autistic child. It is full of heart-wrenching blows and tear-streaming joys. For every moment I have ever been faced with a perceived disappointment, it has immediately been met by Jadyne breaking down some barrier, showing me "This isn't it.....I'm not done fighting, mom." Wow, just wow, that child is amazing!

To view a video on the MobiGo, visit this link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mUntpIpBC30

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